So I started this blog around this time last year. I wrote two posts and never did a thing with it since. I didn’t understand why until recently.
Starting a blog has always been a goal of mine and it really came about because of two things. One, I started reading other people’s blogs, mostly healthy living and fitness blogs. I started getting into these as a way of motivation to live my life in a more health-conscious way and while it definitely lit a spark, the consistency has been lacking.
Second, I am a writer. I know that sounds pretentious and people hear me say that and ask oh, what have you written? While I’ve written creatively for a large chunk of my life, most of my writing has been for myself personally and not something I share. When referring to someone as a writer it doesn’t necessarily mean they are published, it refers to something deeper, something I believe is an intrinsic part of their being. You’re born a writer, and you either are one or you’re not. I would like to eventually write more about this in a future post so for now, I’ll just leave it at that.
So back to this blog. This goal and pull towards creating a blog that sort of chronicles my life and sort of gives me an outlet to put my chaotic waves of thought into words on a semi-regular basis has been present for a long time now. So why did I say I was going to do it just to turn around and quit? The answer I came up with is because I was doing it for the wrong reasons and in the wrong frame of mind.
I was looking at all the numerous blogs I read everyday and saying I love this, or I love that and was sort of on the track of taking my favorite parts of my favorite blogs and putting them all into my blog. That has got to be the least creative and innovative thing I have ever done and thinking back on it kind makes me cringe. I realized that if I want this to be something I enjoy doing and something I’m proud of then it needs to be me, and it needs to be my own. I’ve always done my own thing and I plan to make this blog fit in with that.
The bigger lightbulb I experienced was as a result of some introspectiveness. Now, I have never been someone who apologizes for who I am or someone who tries to change myself for well, anything. I have always been a confident person and never really phased by what others thought of me. But in regards to this blog, I realized that I was worried about what people would think after revealing a deeper part of me on this blog. Even though I don’t plan on getting into the nitty gritty, deep down, life altering parts of me, I do plan on revealing a lot of myself in my posts. Maybe it’s the less than private approach I’m taking, maybe I’m used to relying too much on the comfort of knowing that only a handful of people really know me, but whatever it is, it was a definite road block in the creation of this blog.
So after these profound (ha!) realizations, I’ve decided to start fresh, which is becoming a theme in my life at the moment. If you haven’t already noticed, I’ve deleted the last two posts I wrote (almost a year ago) and I’m starting over with this new post.
This is it, the second official start to my blog. I’ll write another post in the next day or two explaining what I hope this will become, the kind of posts I will be doing and what you can hopefully expect to read from me in the future.
Thanks for reading ;)